Best Self is a guide to personal development broken into simple steps by Mike Bayer, to help you become the best version of yourself.
On most days, you get the feeling that motivational speakers and life coaches are tripping over each other to tell you how uniquely special you are.
Even though this statement is true as no one has ever lived your life before, you still struggle to believe that you are indeed unique.
What if you feel that way because you have not found your true self – the special one everybody can’t seem to stop talking about?
Mike Bayer uses the terms “best self” and “anti-self” to help you understand how you can live as the best version of yourself.
- Audible Audiobook
- Mike Bayer (Author) – Mike Bayer, Phil McGraw (Narrators)
- English (Publication Language)
- 01/08/2019 (Publication Date) – HarperAudio (Publisher)
In summary, three major lessons I learned from reading the book were:
- Visualizing your best self can help you keep your anti-self in check.
- Fear is the disease; honesty is the elixir.
- Looking after yourself is not selfish at all.
Download the book on Audible for free
Lesson One: Visualizing your best self can help you keep your anti-self in check
Your best self and your anti-self are in a constant struggle that only you can break. Your best self is the positive person that inspires other people while the anti-self is the opposite of all the good things that your best-self stands for.
Giving a face to your best self, and its nemesis helps to recognize them easily. You can also improve or nip bad character traits that don’t fit your definition of yourself.
Bayer suggests writing all your positive and negative characteristics on a piece of paper. It also helps if you form a physical appearance in your mind or on paper for each personality.
Doing these things can help you draw the line between who you are, who you want to be, and who you don’t want to be.
Like it or not, the side that rears its head more often ends up as your character.
Lesson Two: Fear is the disease; honesty is the elixir
Finding your best self is not going to be without obstacles, and the biggest happens to be fear.
Fear keeps you boxed in and gives you a botched view of the world.
It makes you worry more about other people judging you and prevents you from making the changes that you need to be the best version of yourself.
Facing your fears requires you to be honest with yourself. Write your fears down and for the first time, look at it systematically, devoid of all other emotions.
For example, the fear of financial ruin is stopping you from quitting a job that makes you miserable and starting your business.
A reasonable solution would be to save up enough to see you through the early days of your business before you begin to turn a profit.
However, this simple solution might not come as easy to you when you think your entire life depends on making the right decision for yourself.
Lesson Three: Looking after yourself is not selfish at all
If you are not in a positive place, you cannot have a positive influence on anyone. The most important relationships in our life thrust us into the role of caregivers and helpers. But how can you give what you don’t have?
There are multiple techniques that you can explore to keep yourself healthy. Some of them include mindful breathing, exercising, proper sleep patterns, and hobbies.
Also, meeting new people and spending time with friends helps to keep you in good moods.
As English poet John Donne said, “no man is an island.”
A 2008 survey by Gallup-Healthways that employed 140,000 Americans showed that people who spent between six and seven hours with friends were happier.
My Personal Takeaway
Upon reading this book, I learned that anyone is capable of living as the best version of themselves.
A little honesty, self-reflection, and forward-thinking are all that you need.
Living your best life does not mean that you have to be a hippie. Even when conflicts arise, take deep breaths and argue calmly.
Yelling will get you nowhere, and be ready to make compromises when you can’t resolve the issue immediately.
Put into Action
- Write down your best traits.
- Write down traits you would prefer to change.
- Integrate quiet time into your schedule.
- Socialize more.
- Take time for yourself.
- Pursue things that make you happy.
You will find that this book is useful to you as a self-helper, innovator, or you are just looking to find deeper meaning in your life.
a Swedish university student, marketing professional, and life-long learner. Here at BookSummaryClub I summarize my favorite non-fiction books into easily digested posts. Hope you like what you’re reading!
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