How To Build Resilience: 9 Ways To Develop Resiliency

BookSummaryClub Blog How To Build Resilience: 9 Ways To Develop Resiliency

How To Develop Resilience?

Tough times knock many people to their knees. Resilience deals with how we handle these tough times and how we’re able to face the world again with a smile. We’ve got a few ways to help build resilience, so when you’re facing struggles, you’ll be able to come out the other side a stronger person.

“Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving, we get stronger and more resilient.” – Steve Maraboli

1. Be Optimistic

It can be challenging to stay positive during tough times. Maintaining a hopeful outlook is very important to your mental health. If you stick your head in the mud in fear, you lose out on the good things you’re learning during struggles. You don’t have to ignore the issues to be positive. You simply have to find useful tidbits in the darkness. Concentrate on the positive outcome.

2. Find Yourself

Resilience is about finding the best version of yourself. You can often discover things about yourself during your darkest times. You may learn some interesting things. You may see that you aren’t the fragile flower in your mind. Sometimes going through the tunnels of dark times leads to people having deeper relationships and a greater sense of strength. They find things deep within that would’ve set dormant if struggles weren’t on hand. You may even appreciate life and change a little more through tough times.

3. Change Is Constant

It’s been said the only thing constant in life is change. Whether this is a good or bad change, that’s all up to you. If you were forever a planted flower, you’d never grow. Life is often a rollercoaster. Some times are good while other times are bad. You have to learn to accept change is going to happen in life. You have to accept that you won’t remain in the same place forever. The world never stops turning, so why should your life? Embrace the changes and move along with them. 

Life is often a rollercoaster. Some times are good while other times are bad.

4. Don’t Fear Failure

Failure is a part of life. Whether it’s failing a test or failing a job interview, we all face it in life. Don’t be afraid to fail. Treat failure as a test that you have to work through and get to the next level. You can handle failure a little better if you treat it as a challenge. Once you’re able to move past that challenge even if you fail, you’ll be a bit more resilient in life. You may be scared to face the challenge, but once you no longer fear failure, you can better visualize success. You may still fail, but you’ll know how to bounce back in these situations. 

5. Face Your Fears

Everyday fears often get in the way of your life. They put you in difficult situations. You have to push yourself to face these fears, so you aren’t paralyzed by them. It’s essential to expose yourself to the things that scare you most slowly. You don’t have to skydive if you’re scared of heights. Instead, jump off the high dive at your local pool. Speak in front of a small group of people if you’re afraid of public speaking. Check out a snake at the zoo in its cage if you hate snakes. This “exposure therapy” helps our brains work with a positive stimulus of our fears. You might not ever totally get over your fears, but you’ll know better how to approach them. 

6. Watch Movies

It might sound crazy to watch another person’s life for resilience, but it just might work. If it’s too hard for you to find the positive in your struggles, watch another person onscreen. Watch how their struggles throughout the movie turn into a happy ending. Use other people’s experiences to practice reappraisal. Think about what the character learned through the struggles. Think about how they acted throughout the issues. What advice would you give them? What advice will you give yourself now? We’re often a lot harder on ourselves than others going through tough times. Sit back and watch your own movie like an outsider. 

7. Keep Life In Perspective

You have to keep things in a positive perspective. Though you’re facing tough trials, remember it might not be as bad as you think. Think of the long term perspective. Try to take out your drama at the exact time. Focus on the future. If you blow the event out of proportion, your mind will play tricks on you. You might go down the wrong rabbit holes scared to face the next day. By keeping things in perspective, you’ll be able to fight through the struggles to the other side.

8. Question The Catastrophe

If you go extreme, you might create a wild catastrophe in your mind. If you lose your job and think your life is a failure, you might be a little dramatic. If you think of only the worst outcomes, you aren’t coming out of this darkness a better person. Think about the issues at hand, then think about the silver linings. By having control of your negative thoughts, you’re taking ownership of them. You’re telling your mind and body that you won’t let this be a catastrophe. 

If you think of only the worst outcomes, you aren’t coming out of this darkness a better person.

9. Take Action

You can’t hide in a corner while you wait for problems to pass. You have to attack issues. You might not be able to solve every struggle, but you can problem-solve to figure out how to approach each issue. Focus on your progress each day. If you’re going through a fight with a friend or hunting for a job, it’s crucial you take action to solve these issues. You’ll feel in control. You’ll be happy you aren’t sitting there just waiting for problems to resolve themselves. While the world does keep spinning, it doesn’t stop for you to cry. Move forward so you can push through.


Overall, resilience isn’t something you learn in a few days. It’s something you must work at through many struggles and dark times. The best thing to remember is that it’s never the end. You may not be able to see tomorrow right now, but the sun is going to rise, and you’ll be ready to face the day once again.

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